I’d Like to Teach the World to Sing

Posted: February 3, 2014 in Rants, Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , ,

Unfortunately I can’t carry a tune in a dump truck.  All that aside, it seems that Coca Cola has managed to offend all true patriotic Americans, or more accurately, Mericans, with their latest commercial centered around the tune America the Beautiful.  I had to look up this bit of marketing which premiered during the Super Bowl, since I was unable to watch what turned out to be a bronc buster of a victory for the Seahawks due to being in a timezone not very conducive to the tailgate party of the year.

Here is the offending commercial, just one of a few that caused a ruckus last night:

The latest controversy seems to be centered around the fact that Coke, a global corporation, headquartered and created in the good old U.S of A, had the temerity to set the commercial to the tune America the Beautiful and not only show images of….foreigners….but change the words from English (yes the official language of our country is the same language by name of the country we fought a revolution from) into the various languages of those represented throughout the commercial.  Surprisingly there is not an Atheist boycott being pitched due to the “GOD shed his grace on thee” verse, that would be a left-right sense of unity that even a fresh, cold Coke could not achieve.

How dare Coca Cola, an American corporation do what they did and not expect a backlash?  I mean what do they know about being American and what kind of example are they setting for our children with this commercial?  Coca Cola, a company that can show the US government a thing or two about being successful around the globe and actually making money at it.  They are one of the most successful US companies today, with a global presence, welcome in the may countries they bottle in and enjoyed freely in some of the most inhospitable places on the planet.  I have been in countries where you can get your head cut off with a rusty knife for having alcohol, but you damn sure can enjoy a cool refreshing Coke.  That naysayers is an example of America at its finest and it is because of a nasty old corporation, that big mean 1%.  Coca Cola is doing successfully and making a profit, invited in with open arms, while the American government pours dollar after dollar down the drain to exert our way of life overseas; that is tax-payer dollars by the way.  They are doing this while making a profit.  Yet Coke is fucked up because of the commercial they put together?

I will tell you what is really fucked up.  Americans, so blinded by their prejudice and hatred who are willing to give up or boycott a successful American product that has succeeded where our government has failed.  People who are willing to talk shit about a product and their commercial because they translated the words to an American staple at baseball games into the many languages spoken by people of nationalities who inhabit our country.  We are and always have been a melting pot and that is what this commercial shows.  What the comments of the detractors show me is that Coke has a much better perspective on the world and what it takes to succeed than the narrow-minded, biased opinion of the average American.

What everyone should be mad at from last night is the piss-poor performance of the most talented quarterback in the NFL today.  I mean come on, he choked like a starlet in a gonzo porn movie.  The Super Bowl is the NFL’s way of sucking more dollars out of the pockets of fans all the while hiding the fact that they are actually a non-profit, tax-exempt organization.  Just to clarify, that is not the teams, just the organization they are governed by.  So Coca Cola, an American corporation with a global reach and a high tax base is the devil for putting together an example of what America should stand for, but the NFL will continue to rack in billions each year and not pay a single dime in taxes?

Go ahead boycott Coke.  That is one thing that your endless social media rants may be able to effect a change on.  Highly doubtful because it is not like the bars and clubs are going to change their cola choice when you order a Jack and Coke, a Bacardi and Coke, or, being the responsible tag along who got stuck with designated driver duty, a simple Coke.  We pretend to be leaders in the world, set the example for other countries when it comes to freedom and liberties, but all you hear is the same sorts of vitriolic trash prevalent in those countries we try to force our way of life on.

Before I wrap up, you veterans who took offense at the Budweiser “A Heroes Welcome” commercial because it was over the top and exploitative, fuck off.  Was the commercial over the top? Possibly, but what does that really matter.  So Budweiser is going to make some money while giving recognition to a returning veteran, big deal.  At least they did it in his hometown and with his friends, families and neighbors.  He wasn’t stood up at a podium in front of a couple hundred people that could give less than a shit about him and honoring the promises they made him all so they could gain a little favor as leaders with a constituency that has no clue what he has been through.

Here is that commercial:

And finally a little flashback to 1971 when Coke enlisted a bunch of hippies and foreigners in one of the most recognizable commercials ever to be made, singing one of the most recognizable ditties ever recorded.  Coke has been this way for at least 42 years people, most of you shit talking, trash mongering ass-hats are not even that old.  Put your efforts into something that will actually do something good for our country and the rest of the world.

Oh, have a Coke and a smile.

Here is  a little Gracie and her blended family for good measure:



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